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Doctors Say This Common Symptom of Grief Will Kill You if You Let It
I could have been another statistic.
How did I get here?
120/80 is normal. A bit less than that is optimal.
My blood pressure reading three months following the death of my wife was 198/130.
I answered my own question. My wife died.
That’s how I got here.
That particular doctor’s visit was five months ago, as this week represents eight months since I unexpectedly lost Lorie.
It was a fraught visit, to say the least.
The doctor asked me how long my pressure had been so elevated. I told him I honestly did not know as my wife passed three months before and I was never diligent with doctors’ appointments.
He told me if the numbers were stress-related due to my then-recent loss, it was understandable. He also told me, however, if those numbers represented a consistent blood pressure read I ran the risk of suffering an imminent stroke or heart attack as a result.
He struck a nerve. Lorie died from complications of a major hemorrhagic stroke, caused by the bursting of an undetected brain aneurysm.
The doctor said brain aneurysms can result from such high blood pressure (though my wife’s was generally stable). He also asked me about my activity level since Lorie died.
“What activity level?” I forlornly replied. He stared at me, irresponsive, so I continued. “When I’m not lying in bed trying to catch up on my sleep due to insomnia, I’m sitting down writing articles and a book about my wife.”
“How much sleep have you averaged a night since she died?” he asked.
“Maybe a couple of hours. I toss and turn all night long,” I said.
“How much sleep do you get during the day?”
“If I’m lucky, an hour. I try and lay in bed most of the day but sleep doesn’t happen.”
